her definition's have been wrong.

i went back to my allpoetry.com account that i haven't contributed to since i was 18. i came across a poem that i wrote 5 years ago and - like most all of my work on that site - was never shared with anyone who didn't have that username. i found it interesting that it was originally written about my experiences with self-injury (a behavior extremely common to go hand-in-hand with eating disorders), but reeks to hell of a recipe for anorexia. how i never saw the symptoms sooner blows my mind.

now, let's just remember i was 16 when i wrote this - it's not about the lack of writing ability. we don't judge here :P

Beauty's On the Inside

Beauty's on the inside

She's eating me alive

I've heard once that beauty brings pain

From what has this derived?

Beauty's on the inside

She's playing with my soul

Pulling, pushing, clawing hard

Begging for control

Beauty's on the inside

Her definitions have been wrong

She's a tortured personality

Failing to be strong

Beauty's on the inside

Tearing at my mind

She's pulling me down with her

Pain and pleasure half combined

Beauty's on the inside

But I want to bring her out

Find out what all the pain looks like

Perhaps remove some doubt

Beauty's on the outside

A blissful cerise shade

Beading at an open wound

I'd opened unafraid

© eliptical*****18 2003