Saturday, February 2, 2008

her definition's have been wrong.

i went back to my account that i haven't contributed to since i was 18. i came across a poem that i wrote 5 years ago and - like most all of my work on that site - was never shared with anyone who didn't have that username. i found it interesting that it was originally written about my experiences with self-injury (a behavior extremely common to go hand-in-hand with eating disorders), but reeks to hell of a recipe for anorexia. how i never saw the symptoms sooner blows my mind.
now, let's just remember i was 16 when i wrote this - it's not about the lack of writing ability. we don't judge here :P

Beauty's On the Inside

Beauty's on the inside
She's eating me alive
I've heard once that beauty brings pain
From what has this derived?

Beauty's on the inside
She's playing with my soul
Pulling, pushing, clawing hard
Begging for control

Beauty's on the inside
Her definitions have been wrong
She's a tortured personality
Failing to be strong

Beauty's on the inside
Tearing at my mind
She's pulling me down with her
Pain and pleasure half combined

Beauty's on the inside
But I want to bring her out
Find out what all the pain looks like
Perhaps remove some doubt

Beauty's on the outside
A blissful cerise shade
Beading at an open wound
I'd opened unafraid

© eliptical*****18 2003


Labyrinith said...

Wow. Amazing.
Love you Em.

Ashton said...

i love your poem! it's soo good. my name is ashton, by the way, from pale reflections. <3